Today was a bad day, I'm sorry to say. Usually, Sundays are the best. I get to go to church, wear a dress, hear great messages- and although all of those things happened, it was just not a good day.
I woke up with a sore neck, and I was still very tired. Then my hair looked dumb, then my outfit looked all wrong, then it was hot... I could name several other things but I'll save you from a rant.
So anyways, it seemed like anything anyone did was annoying and I couldn't do anything right either, and I wasn't much fun to be around. And I started to feel kinda ugly on the inside. I was being mean and having negative thoughts. I wasn't very fond of myself at all.
So why am I telling you about my awful day? Well, hopefully what I say next will help your next bad day. But it might just annoy you if you're in the midst of your bad day... haha.
I realized, while reading inspirational quotes on Pinterest (I know how cliche and ridiculous this sounds) that this is just one day that had some not so great circumstances, but it will end, and it will be Monday. I get to wake up again and try to make it not so crummy. I can pray for comfort and hope that it will get better, and that already makes me hopeful. I don't think I'm truly ugly on the inside, I was just acting ugly. And that can be changed. If we can recognize that we're not allowing ourselves to be happy, then we can change it. We can turn our day around.
I have been doing the one billion clicks thing (http://www.billionclicks.org/) and I haven't clicked today yet... I'm sure I've had a positive thought, but all my negative thoughts were much louder and beat up all my positive thoughts. It's interesting to me that even though our positive thoughts make us feel better, and happier, and do better things, our negative thoughts are so much easier to come by some days. While on Pinterest I found a quote that says: "beauty is the best possible version of yourself on the inside and out." I am trying to improve my inner beauty and days like this one have not made that easy. But, I'm gonna keep trying, and hoping for better days.
So, good luck with your bad days. And really, sometimes all we need is a diet caffeine free Coke, and a blog rant. haha. And a call from a friend always helps!
Don't forget your beautiful on the inside, and out even on bad days!
Sunday, May 20, 2012
Thursday, May 17, 2012
Just One Thing
Right now, think of one thing you like about yourself- just one thing... Got it? Now, keep that one thing in mind.
When I am around people, I am constantly judging myself. I can think of several things that are wrong with me. Because of my social anxiety, it is already hard for me to be around people, and I am always thinking of things I am doing wrong while I'm talking to someone. I know that I always do goofy things with my hands, I laugh too loud, I smile funny, I play with my hair... the list goes on. So then when I walk away, I instantly start thinking of things I could and couldn't have done. And then I end up just being completely disappointed with myself. It's terrible. I don't let myself think things like: "at least I'm trying", or "you did your best for your circumstances". No, that is not good enough for me. I'm a bit of a perfectionist so when I can't do something as well as I think it should have been done, I am disappointed, and even mad at myself.
So then I have to stop myself. It's not always easy to stop yourself in the middle of an I Hate Myself Rant- but it can be done. Then I have to start reversing. I have to think of things I did right; things I like about myself. Even if it's just one thing. And most of the time, even one thing is hard to come up with. I have written down in my room a few things that I think are beautiful about myself. I refer to the list when nothing is coming to mind.
So, right now, I would encourage you to think of that one thing you like about yourself, and write it down somewhere you can refer back to. Try to add to the list every time you think of something you like about yourself. Once you have written something down, you cannot deny it when you read it again.
I think it is much easier to love yourself, then judge yourself. You are happier when you are loving yourself and others. I am trying to work everyday on just accepting myself. My Heavenly Father loves me, my family loves me, I should love me.
-Meagan Tweedy
When I am around people, I am constantly judging myself. I can think of several things that are wrong with me. Because of my social anxiety, it is already hard for me to be around people, and I am always thinking of things I am doing wrong while I'm talking to someone. I know that I always do goofy things with my hands, I laugh too loud, I smile funny, I play with my hair... the list goes on. So then when I walk away, I instantly start thinking of things I could and couldn't have done. And then I end up just being completely disappointed with myself. It's terrible. I don't let myself think things like: "at least I'm trying", or "you did your best for your circumstances". No, that is not good enough for me. I'm a bit of a perfectionist so when I can't do something as well as I think it should have been done, I am disappointed, and even mad at myself.
So then I have to stop myself. It's not always easy to stop yourself in the middle of an I Hate Myself Rant- but it can be done. Then I have to start reversing. I have to think of things I did right; things I like about myself. Even if it's just one thing. And most of the time, even one thing is hard to come up with. I have written down in my room a few things that I think are beautiful about myself. I refer to the list when nothing is coming to mind.
So, right now, I would encourage you to think of that one thing you like about yourself, and write it down somewhere you can refer back to. Try to add to the list every time you think of something you like about yourself. Once you have written something down, you cannot deny it when you read it again.
I think it is much easier to love yourself, then judge yourself. You are happier when you are loving yourself and others. I am trying to work everyday on just accepting myself. My Heavenly Father loves me, my family loves me, I should love me.
-Meagan Tweedy
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